It’s late. Later than usual, for me. Outside, the full moon transits over my house. And yours. Everyone’s house is covered by the moonlight tonight.
I sit at this desk, in this house, typing on this keyboard. There is a sudden clarity, a clear light, a relief. Miraculous, instantaneous. I am ok.
It sounds like a 70s self-help book. But it’s not. It’s just the lifting of darkness, the rising of the moon, the startling recognition of the simplicity of being. When the sun went down, I was confused. Now, in the middle of the night, that confusion has melted and all that’s left is all that is. Moonrise. Sunset.
Today I realized that February is about forgiveness. This coming month, the theme and motivation and primary action of my life is to forgive. First of all, myself. And then anyone else I’ve ever blamed. And then the god of my understanding. And then the corporations, the republicans, the polluters, the species-extincters, my mother, my father, my siblings, my friends, that guy who cut me off the other day at the intersection of River and Water in downtown Santa Cruz. Everyone. And then, again, most of all, myself.
Come, Come, whoever you are!
Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving.
Come. This is not a caravan of despair.
It doesn’t matter if you’ve broken your vow
a thousand times,
and yet again, Come!
(translated by Coleman Barks)
went to a little party on the beach tonight for my friend Lauren’s birthday
arrived at sunset and took photos
not sure if there are any good ones
but I can’t download them to my computer
my computer is so full that it can’t breathe anymore
so I bought an external 500 GB drive today
and i’m going to put all my photos on it tonight
and delete most of them off my computer tomorrow
i’m worried that the organization will be lost because i have a mac and the one bad thing about the mac is that all the photos are in iphoto and not organized in folders because i haven’t figured out how to do that and if you thought this post was a poem because of how it was written before
it was not a poem
its just lacking punctuation or capitalization and it’s one big long thought
and now you can finally take a breath
and say what of interest is even in this blog
and to that I cannot answer
because nothing very interesting is in this blog